New ask Hacker News story: Ask HN: I get defensive when engineers critique my decisions, help

Ask HN: I get defensive when engineers critique my decisions, help
3 by haburka | 1 comments on Hacker News.
I tend to be the lead on projects I run and I have a lot of experience in my field, and I try very hard to make technical decisions that are well justified and correct given the constraints and conditions of the project. Generally I’m fine when most engineers give advice or opinions but sometimes people will say things that I strongly disagree with and it seems that I need to spend time explaining why they’re wrong, which can be a bit difficult in a meeting. I find myself getting a bit overwhelmed and defensive if someone says something with a lot of conviction and it’s something I disagree with. I would much rather be indifferent and calmly consider their perspective and come up with some kind of appreciative response but its hard to be indifferent when I know I’ll have to build the outcome of this decision. Any advice?

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